Betrayed by his best friends
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By David Burchfield, Director of Worship and Arts
I’m lucky to have very little experience with deep betrayal. The worst I can remember is the time my wife and I flew to Anchorage then drove several hours north to do a packraft trip with a friend. We’d had plans set for weeks and honestly felt a little stressed about the higher stakes of Alaskan backcountry travel, so it was nice to know Jenna (not her real name) and her boyfriend would be joining us. When we arrived at Jenna’s family cabin she bailed on the trip with no real explanation. It was puzzling and very disappointing. I felt a hot mix of anger and sadness as I realized my friend was not only checking out of the trip, but the friendship too, when she didn’t even bother to talk through her reasoning. Anyway - my wife and I did the trip alone, didn’t get mauled or drowned, and had a great time - so it all pretty much worked out.
Even as I write it, the worst, betrayal I have experienced, it feels completely inappropriate to even put on the same scale of comparison as the betrayal of Jesus by his disciples. Judas hands him over to the Sanhedrin. Peter denies him. They all fall asleep in the garden while Jesus is on death’s door. I guess it becomes easy to see it all in past tense as a series of events that we’re used to hearing about and maybe quickly mourning on our a way to - hooray! - Easter morning. Jesus is the victor and all that’s past is forgiven and forgotten.
But you know what? It hits a lot harder when you substitute the words “best friends” for “disciples.” Jesus’ ride or die best buddies in the world, who hours before were making grand proclamations about their allegiance to him, all just slipped away in his final hours, leaving him with just John and his mother as he took his final, ragged breaths.
Before we rush into the light of Easter morning, I think it’s important to sit in the darkness, pain, anger, and horrible sadness of betrayal with Jesus for a moment. Why? Because that’s where we see his love. Jesus asks his friends to stay awake and pray with him, but when he wakes them his admonition is for their own good (“Get up and pray so that you will not fall into temptation.” Luke 22:46.) When one of his followers cuts off the ear of a soldier who’s come to arrest him, Jesus heals the guy. As he takes his last breaths, he prays a prayer of compassion for his enemies and the very friends who betrayed and abandoned him (“Forgive them Father…”).
"The hand of him who will betray me is with me at the table" - Luke 22:21
Jesus knew it. He knew it all, and he still knelt before his own followers and humbly washed their feet.
It’s so easy to skip ahead to Jesus’ victory on Easter, but this Good Friday, let’s pause in our own lives to look at who He was when own best friends were letting him down in the worst imaginable ways. Have you been disappointed by a friend or loved one? Have you been hurt, betrayed, abandoned?* Or were you maybe on the other end - causing the harm? Can you recall that knot rising in your throat when you realized how alone that made you feel? Are you feeling it now? What do you see in Jesus’ enduring love for his faithless friends in his final hours? What do you see in his enduring love for those who’ve hurt you (or whom you’ve hurt)? What is God calling you into in that relationship?
I do NOT mean to conflate forgiveness and Jesus-like love with returning to or remaining in dangerous or abusive situations. Jesus’ ministry is marked by repeatedly confronting unjust power relationships and healing those hurt by them. If you need help, please send an email to Pastor of Family and Kids Lydia Foreman at lydia@missiodeislc.com